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Tony In The Morning Blog

  Man! The CRAZIEST stuff happens to ME. I AM married. And, I have KIDS. And a dog. And two cats. Read about it HERE...

Posts from March 2013


Coaching softball
SO YEAH..

I'M COACHING A "BAKERSFIELD BOBBY SOX" SOFTBALL TEAM..

I COACHED "BOTH"-MY DAUGHTERS MEGAN & COLLEEN

WHEN "THEY"-PLAYED BOBBY SOX..

& IT'S FUNNY...

BECAUSE "BACK"-THEN..
"I"-THOUGHT "I" WAS "SO"-SMART..

THE THING WAS..

I KNEW "BASEBALL"..

& BASEBALL...& SOFTBALL
ARE "VERY"-DIFFERENT GAMES..

I'M "REALLY"-EMBARRASSED "NOW"

OVER HOW "LITTLE"
I-KNEW..

WELL..MY GIRLS WENT ON TO PLAY AT STOCKDALE..

WHERE THEY HAD A "GREAT"-COACH..

(& I..LEARNED A-"LOT" ABOUT THE GAME)..

SO..

NOW THAT THE KIDS ARE OUT OF THE HOUSE..

I WANTED TO VOLUNTEER..

& I'VE "ALWAYS"-LIKED COACHING..

SO I "DECIDED"

TO GIVE BOBBY SOX ANOTHER-TRY..

(I'M COACHING A TEAM OF "MOSTLY" 8TH GRADERS)..

& "WHEN" I WENT-"BACK"..

I "CONCIOUSLY" WENT-"BACK"

WITH A "DIFFERENT"-ATTITUDE..

I "TOLD"-MYSELF

THERE "WASN'T" GOING TO BE ANY "PRESSURE"..

IT WAS "ALL"-ABOUT "TEACHING" THE GIRLS THE GAME..

& "HELPING" THEM BECOME BETTER PLAYERS..

& IT'S "NOT"

ABOUT WINNING OR LOSING..

& "THEN"..

WE STARTED THE SEASON WITH "3"-STRAIGHT LOSSES..

(& I "SWEAR..
I'M GETTING AN "ULCER")..
 (0) Comments
Tags :  
Topics: Sports
Social:
People: BOBBY SOX




 
Work makes HIM grouchy
SO..

MY BOY JD..

(A RECENT-GRAD OF THE UNIVERSITY OF ARIZONA)..

(WHO IS NOW A "TOBACCO SALESMAN" IN PHOENIX)..

IS 22..

"GOING"-ON "52"..

I WAS TALKING TO HIM ON THE PHONE LAST-NIGHT..

& HE WAS TIRED & GROUCHY..

("BECAUSE" HE HAS A "JOB"--

6-MONTHS-AGO..
HE "COULDN'T"-WAIT
TO GRADUATE..

"NOW"..HE'S TIRED & GROUCHY

"ON" A "TUESDAY")..

SO..

HE'S BEEN LIVING IN PHOENIX
SINCE JANUARY..

& LAST NIGHT
HE WAS "COMPLAINING"

ABOUT "ALL" THE "PEOPLE"

"IN" PHOENIX..

& I SAID-"WELL IT "IS" A BIG CITY"..

& "HE"-SAID..

"NO--I'M TALKING ABOUT "ALL"
THE "PEOPLE"

HERE

ON SPRING BREAK..

NOW A YEAR-AGO

"HE" WAS ON SPRING BREAK..

"IN"-----PHOENIX..

IT'S FUNNY..

1-SPRING BREAK..

YOU'RE WEARING FLIP FLOPS..
DRINKING BEER..
& CHECKING OUT THE GIRLS IN BIKINIS..

& THE NEXT...
YOU'RE WEARING KHAKI'S &
A POLO-SHIRT..
TRYING TO CONVINCE THE MANAGER OF A "CHEVRON"..
TO SELL MORE "MARLBOROS"..

& YOU'RE TIRED & GROUCHY

ON A "TUESDAY"..
 (0) Comments
Tags :  
Topics: Law_Crime
Social:
Locations: ArizonaPhoenix




 
My kids are NERDS!
"MY"-KIDS..

ARE "NERDS"..

THE YOUNGEST-COLLEEN-
CALLED HOME LAST NIGHT..

SHE GOT A SUMMER INTERNSHIP WITH "LIBERTY MUTUAL"..

THE "INSURANCE"-COMPANY..

COLLEEN GETS A'S IN CLASSES LIKE "STATISTICS"..& "FINANCE"

MY KIDS..

-ARE CONCIENTIOUS ABOUT THEIR SCHOOL-WORK..

-ALWAYS GO TO CLASS..

-GET GOOD-GRADES..

-THEY EXERCISE..& EAT HEALTHY..

-THEY "ALWAYS"-USE SUN BLOCK..

-THEY "SEEM"
TO ENJOY HANGING OUT WITH THEIR PARENTS..

& WHAT'S "REALLY" HARD TO FIGURE-OUT..

"I"..

AM "NOT"

A NERD..

(& "NEVER"
HAVE BEEN)..

AS FAR-BACK AS I CAN REMEMBER..

"I"..

WAS "COOL"..

-I SKIPPED CLASSES..

-"DIDN'T" GET GOOD GRADES..

-DROVE A "COOL"-CAR..
(A 1974 AMC-JAVELIN)..

-SMOKED..

("EVERYONE"-KNOWS THAT THE "COOLEST"-TEENAGERS SMOKE)..

-I WAS IN COLLEGE FOR "6"-YEARS..

("6"--OF THE "BEST" YEARS OF MY LIFE)..

"I"..

DID SOME "PRETTY"-CRAZY STUFF
GROWING-UP..

"BUT"

I "NEVER"-"SHARED"..

"ANY"

OF IT..

WITH MY KIDS..

IN FACT..

"EVERY"-TIME THEY ASKED-ME

ABOUT WHAT "I" WAS-LIKE

GROWING-UP..

I "LIED"

I "SAID"--I WAS A NERD..

(EVEN-THOUGH I "WASN'T"---

"NOOOOOO"-WAY)..

& NOW

I HAVE A SON..

WHO HAS A GOOD-JOB..

SELLING TOBACCO..

& A DAUGHTER..

INTERNING FOR AN INSURANCE COMPANY..
 
HONESTLY..

I "COULDN'T" BE PROUDER..
 (0) Comments
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Topics: Education
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Abducted by Aliens
"THIS"..

IS THE "WIERDEST"-THING..

"I"..

WOKE-UP SATURDAY MORNING

WITH LARGE-"BRUISES"..

ON "BOTH"

MY RIGHT "&" LEFT BICEPS..

(BIG--DARK--BRUISES)..

"&"..

"ABRASIONS"..

ON THE "OUTSIDE"

OF "BOTH"

MY KNEES..

(THE ABRASION ON THE OUTSIDE OF MY "LEFT"-KNEE
IS THE SIZE OF A "QUARTER"..

IT'S "HUGE"..

& "NASTY"-LOOKING--

ALL "SCABBED"-UP)..

& "I"

COULDN'T FIGURE-OUT

"HOW"

THESE INJURIES "OCCURRED"

NOW THE "1ST"-PERSON I "SUSPECTED"..

(I MEAN THE 1ST-PERSON
I "ASKED"-ABOUT IT)..

WAS MY WIFE..

(I-"HAD" BEEN WATCHING A-"LOT" OF COLLEGE BASKETBALL
IN THE MAN-CAVE..

WHILE "IGNORING"

"HER"-NEEDS)..

WELL "SHE" SAID "NO"---

IT "WASN'T"-HER..

(& THEN SHE SAID SOMETHING "ELSE"-ABOUT HER "JOB"--
& SOMETHING ABOUT "TRADER JOES" BEING "OUT" OF COCONUT WATER)..

ANYWAY..

"I"

WAS PERPLEXED..

"UNTIL"..

LAST NIGHT..

I WAS WATCHING THE "HISTORY CHANNEL"

(BECAUSE COLLEGE BASKETBALL
IS "OFF" UNTIL THURSDAY)..

& THEY HAD THIS SHOW
ABOUT "ALIEN ABDUCTIONS"..

(HAVE YOU "EVER"-SEEN THIS??--
IT'S "INCREDIBLE")..

"ACTUAL"-PEOPLE

WHO "CLAIM"

"THEY"

WERE "ABDUCTED BY ALIENS"..

THIS ONE-GUY
EVEN-SAID

"HE"--WAS TAKEN-"UP"-

TO THE ALIEN SPACECRAFT..

"STRAPPED" TO A GURNEY..

& "PROBED"..

(BECAUSE IT WAS "SO"-TERRIFYING..
HE WAS "ONLY"-ABLE
TO "REMEMBER" THIS
THROUGH-"HYPNOSIS")..

WELL..

("AFTER" SCHEDULING AN APPOINTMENT WITH A HYPNOTIST)..

IT "HIT"-ME..

"THAT'S"

WHAT-"MUST"

HAVE HAPPENED TO "ME"..

"I"..

WAS "ABDUCTED BY ALIENS"

("OBVIOUSLY"-CHOSEN DUE TO MY "SUPERIOR"-HUMAN GENES)..

"I"

WAS TAKEN-"UP" TO THEIR SPACECRAFT..

& "PROBED"..

& THE "BRUISES"..
(ON MY BICEPS)..

& THE "ABRASIONS"..
(ON MY KNEES)..

ARE "OBVIOUSLY"

"WHERE"

THE ALIEN SCIENTISTS

"RESTRAINED"-ME..

"DURING"

THE PROBING..

("NOW"..

IT "ALL" MAKES-SENSE)..

MY DOCTOR

"ALSO"-HAS TO "RESTRAIN"-ME..

DURING MY PROSTATE EXAM..

(I "HATE"

BEING "PROBED"--

"ON"-EARTH..

OR..

"IN"-SPACE)..
 (0) Comments


 
Kids' boyfriend/girlfriend
SO..

"2"...OF OUR "3"-KIDS..

HAVE A STEADY BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND..

JD..OUR OLDEST..

HAS BEEN DATING THE SAME-GIRL--HANNAH--FOR 3-YEARS..

& COLLEEN..OUR YOUNGEST..

HAS HAD HER BOYFRIEND-ALEX--FOR OVER A YEAR..

& THE "THING"-IS..

WE "LIKE"-

THEM BOTH..

("QUITE"-A-BIT)..

HONESTLY..

"BOTH"..ARE "GREAT"
MARRIAGE-MATERIAL..

LIKE JD....
HANNAH HAS GRADUATED COLLEGE..& HAS A GOOD JOB..

SHE'S "REALLY"-NICE..
& POLITE..
& HARD-WORKING..
& CUTE..

& SHE "PUTS-UP" WITH JD'S "CRAP"..

& COLLEEN'S BOYFRIEND-ALEX..

"SAME"-THING..

NICE..
POLITE..
TREATS COLLEEN "REALLY"-WELL...

(TALL...ATHLETIC..GOOD-LOOKING GUY)..

& PUTS-UP WITH COLLEEN'S "CRAP"..

IF "I" COULD "PICK" THE PERSON THAT EITHER ONE OF THEM WOULD SPEND THE
REST OF THEIR LIFE WITH..

I WOULD PICK HANNAH & ALEX..

BUT..

IT'S "NOT" "MY"-DECISION..

"SO"..

I HAVE TO "REMIND"-MYSELF

"NOT" TO GET "TOO"-ATTACHED

TO "EITHER"-ONE OF THEM..

"BECAUSE" IT MAY "NOT"-LAST..

I MEAN JD IS LIVING THE "GOOD-LIFE" RIGHT NOW..

22-YEARS-OLD..
SELLING TOBACCO..
MAKING DECENT MONEY..
LIVING IN AN APARTMENT WITH A BUDDY..
IN PHOENIX..

"&"......

HE'S "SINGLE"..

("I"..AM "SO"-JEALOUS)..

& COLLEEN IS "JUST" A SOPHOMORE AT THE UNIVERSITY OF ARIZONA..

SO SHE HAS "LOTS" OF SCHOOL LEFT..

"BUT"..THE THING WITH COLLEEN..

ALEX IS HER "1ST"-REAL BOYFRIEND..

"SHE'S" KINDA'-PICKY..

(I "DID"..
SET THE BAR "PRETTY"-HIGH)..

I'M A "LITTLE"-AFRAID..

THAT IF JD OR COLLEEN..

BREAK-UP....WITH HANNAH OR ALEX..

"I"..
WILL BE THE ONE WITH THE BROKEN HEART..
 (1) Comments
Tags :  
Topics: Human Interest
Social:
Locations: ArizonaPhoenix
People: HANNAH OR ALEX




 
Remembering GOOD times
SO..

I'VE MENTIONED BEFORE..

"I'M"........A BIG "SAP"..

MY 2-DAUGHTERS PLAYED SOFTBALL
GROWING-UP..

& "ALL" 4-YEARS OF HIGH SCHOOL AT STOCKDALE..

& MY WIFE & I

"LOVED"

"EVERY"-MINUTE OF IT..

IT WAS "SUCH" A "MAJOR"-PART OF OUR LIVES..

FOR "SO"-MANY YEARS..

WELL "THAT"-ENDED..

"2"-YEARS AGO..

& I "TRY"-

"NOT" TO DWELL "TOO"-MUCH

ON "THOSE"-DAYS MUCH..

BECAUSE IT JUST MAKES ME "NOSTALGIC"..

& "SAD"..

WELL..

THE PITCHER FOR THAT STOCKDALE TEAM WAS JUSTINE VELA
(vell-UH)..

JUSTINE..
WENT TO SCHOOL
AT U-C DAVIS..

WHERE SHE "STILL" PITCHES..

WELL..

THIS PAST-SATURDAY..

U-C DAVIS..

CAME TO BAKERSFIELD..
TO PLAY CSUB..

WELL OF-"COURSE"

MY WIFE & I "HAD" TO GO..

TO SEE THIS PITCHER..

(& GREAT KID)..

WHO WE HAD SPENT SO-MUCH TIME "WITH"---THAT SHE PRACTICALLY-FELT..
LIKE A MEMBER OF THE FAMILY..

& AS "SOON" AS I WALKED INTO THE COMPLEX..

& SAW JUSTINE OUT-THERE..

PITCHING..

I WAS "OVERWHELMED"
WITH THIS SENSE OF "PRIDE"..

& "SADNESS"..

OVER "GREAT-MEMORIES-PAST"..

& "THEN"..

WHEN WE WENT-"UP"
IN-TO THE STANDS..

TO SEE JUSTINE'S MOM-ROSEANNE..

& HER DAD--JOSE..

& AS I WAS HUGGING-THEM..

I STARTED GETTING "TEARS"
IN MY EYES..

I WAS "SURPRISED"

HOW-"EMOTIONAL" IT WAS FOR ME..
IT WAS "JUST" A "SOFTBALL"-GAME..
 (0) Comments
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Topics: Human Interest
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Colleen's friends visit
YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE "REALLY"
ENJOYED..

ABOUT SEEING OUR COLLEGE KIDS OVER SPRING BREAK?..

MEETING THEIR FRIENDS..

COLLEEN-OUR YOUNGEST

BROUGHT HOME "3"-FRIENDS FROM THE UNIVERSITY OF ARIZONA THE LAST
COUPLE OF DAYS..

(YOU MAY HAVE HEARD THEM ON THE AIR WITH ME "YESTERDAY"
MORNING--COLLEEN..JORDAN..
ALLISON..& COLLEEN'S "BOYFRIEND" ALEX-GRRRRRR)..

BUT..

THEY'RE JUST "REALLY"-NICE KIDS..

THEY'RE FUN TO TALK TO..

& BE AROUND..

"&"..

I'M "COMFORTABLE"..

BEING "AROUND"-THEM..

(& BEING AROUND A GROUP OF 20-SOMETHING'S CAN "DEFINITELY" BE "UNCOMFORTABLE")..

BUT..

(I'M HALF-"AFRAID" TO "SAY"-IT--
BECAUSE THEY'RE "ONLY"
20-SOMETHING)..

BUT..

(whisper)--THEY'RE "REALLY"
GOOD KIDS..

I MEAN FOR COLLEEN'S BOYFRIEND..

WHO I HAVEN'T MET THAT MANY TIMES..

TO COME IN "HERE" YESTERDAY..

& GO ON THE AIR........WITH "ME"..

TRYING TO BE A "TOUGH-DAD"..

WELL..

THAT SHOW'S SOME CHARACTER..

"&"........

I REALLY-

"SHOULDN'T" BE SURPRISED..

THAT "HE".....IS THE "KIND" OF BOYFRIEND..

& "THEY"
ARE THE TYPE OF FRIENDS

"MY-COLLEEN"

WOULD CHOOSE..
 (0) Comments
Tags :  
Topics: Human Interest
Social:
Locations: Arizona
People: COLLEEN-OUR YOUNGEST




 
It NEVER ends..
SO..

"BOTH" OF OUR COLLEGE KIDS ARE ON SPRING BREAK THIS WEEK..

WE WENT TO VISIT MEGAN IN NYC OVER THE PAST 5-DAYS..

(& HAD A "BLAST" WITH "HER")..

& "THEN"

WHEN WE GOT HOME YESTERDAY AFTERNOON..

OUR YOUNGEST-COLLEEN..

WHO GOES TO THE UNIVERSITY OF ARIZONA..

WAS THERE TO "MEET"-US
WITH "3"-OF HER FRIENDS..

(& IT'S "GREAT"
TO SEE MY "LITTLE"-GIRL)..

& "YES"..
THEY'RE GROWING-UP..
& MATURING...

"SLOOOOOOOWLY"..

MEGAN...LIVES IN AN APARTMENT..
IN THE BRONX..

IT WAS THE "1ST"-TIME I HAD VISITED A KID OF MINE..

WHO LIVED IN THEIR "OWN"-PLACE..

(A PLACE THAT WASN'T A COLLEGE DORM..OR COLLEGE "RENTAL")..

SOMEPLACE MY WIFE & I COULD "STAY"..

& "HONESTLY"..

"I" WAS "THINKING"....

ABOUT A LITTLE "PAYBACK"..

"MY" PLAN

WAS TO GO TO HER APARTMENT..

TURN-ON "EVERY" LIGHT..
& TURN-"UP" THE THERMOSTAT..
&LEAVE MY CLOTHES LAYING "ALL"-OVER THE PLACE..
& MY DIRTY DISHES IN THE SINK..
& USE-UP "ALL" HER TOOTHPASTE..

"BUT"..

AFTER ABOUT THE "2ND"-DAY

I "REALIZED"..

THAT "SHE"
WAS "ALREADY"
DOING "ALL" OF "THOSE"-THINGS

"HERSELF"..

& "EVEN"-WORSE..

"I'M"

PAYING THE RENT..

(SO "THAT" WAS A BAD-PLAN)..

& "THEN"

WE GET HOME..

WHERE COLLEEN & HER FRIENDS ARE WAITING..

(& IT WAS "WARM" IN BAKERSFIELD YESTERDAY--LIKE "80"..
WHICH FELT "GREAT"
AFTER THE COLD & RAIN OF NYC)..

& I "NOTICE"..

THAT THE HOUSE "FEELS"-COOL..

YET "ALL" THE WINDOWS ARE "CLOSED"..

SO I GO TO THE THERMOSTAT..

& THE A-C IS "ON"..

& I "SAY"

"TO" COLLEEN..

"DID YOU TURN THE A-C ON?"..

& "SHE"-SAYS..

"IT WASN'T ME"..

(NOW THE "NEXT"-LOGICAL CHOICE IS MOLLY----OUR DOG)..

"BUT"..

SHE JUST GOT HER HAIR CUT..

SO..SHE'S "PROBABLY" NOT "HOT"..
ON AN "80"-DEGREE DAY)..
 (0) Comments
Tags :  
Topics: Human Interest
Social:
Locations: Arizona




 
Visitng Megan in NYC
SO..

MY WIFE & I SPENT THE LAST 5-DAYS IN NEW YORK..VISITING OUR DAUGHTER MEGAN..

AT HER APARTMENT IN THE BRONX..

(THAT "I"-PAY 600-DOLLARS-A-MONTH FOR)..

& "MY" APARTMENT
IS "PRETTY" NICE..

ON THE 4TH FLOOR..

DECENT-SIZE LIVING ROOM & KITCHEN..
2-BEDROOMS..
A BATH..

YOU HAVE TO BE "BUZZED"-IN..

IT'S IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD..

WITH A "BUNCH" OF RESTAURANTS & SHOPS..

WE DID "ALL" THE "TOURISTY"-THINGS..

WENT TO THE 9-11 MEMORIAL..

WALKED-OVER THE BROOKLYN BRIDGE..

WENT TO THE "TOP" OF THE ROCKEFELLER CENTER..

TO BROADWAY TO SEE A MUSICAL
("MATILDA"--"I" GOT "CHOKED-UP")..

TO TIMES SQUARE..

AROUND HER "BEAUTIFUL" CAMPUS AT FORDHAM..

& I SWEAR..

MEGAN "WALKED-ME"

"IN"-TO THE GROUND..

WE WALKED "EVERYWHERE"..

BLOCK-AFTER-BLOCK-AFTER-BLOCK..

("I" WAS-LIKE
IS "THAT" A SUBWAY OVER-THERE?..
IS "THAT" A TAXI?--

I'M IN "DECENT"-SHAPE..
BUT "MAN"..
I WAS SORE & TIRED AT THE END OF THE DAY)..

THE "COOLEST"-THING OF "ALL"??..

"SEEING" MEGAN IN HER "ENVIRONMENT"..

"SEEING" HER "CONFIDENCE"....

HER-FRIENDS..

(WHO "WORK" & "STUDY"-AS "HARD" AS SHE DOES)..

SHE'S FUN TO "BE"-WITH....

& FUNNY..

SEEING "HER"..

& THE WOMAN SHE'S "BECOMING"..

"THAT"

WAS THE BEST-"SIGHT"

"I"-SAW..
THE "WHOLE"-TIME WE WERE IN NYC..
 (0) Comments
Tags :  
Topics: Human Interest
Social:
Locations: BathNew York




 
Scaring my co-workers
SO "I"..

HAVE "BAD"-ANKLES..

I HURT MY ANKLES

WHEN I WAS A JUNIOR HIGH TRACK-STAR IN HUNTINGTON, IN..

NOW HERE AT WORK..

WE LIKE TO "SCARE" EACH-OTHER..

YOU KNOW..

HIDE AROUND A CORNER..

OR BEHIND A DOOR..

TO "JUMP"-OUT..

& "SCARE"

AN "UNSUSPECTING" CO-WORKER..

("PREFERRABLY" A FEMALE CO-WORKER)..

WELL YESTERDAY..

"I" WAS WALKING
ACROSS THE PARKING LOT..

COMING FROM CORPORATE..

& I "SAW"..CRYSTAL DIAZ..
FROM THE SALES DEPARTMENT

HEADING TO "HER"-OFFICE..

& "SHE"....

"DIDN'T"

SEE

ME..

SO "I"

TROTTED UP..

(QUIETLY---LIKE A "NINJA")..

"NEXT" TO THE KGFM VAN..

& I "WAITED".........

FOR "HER"

TO WALK BY..

ON THE "OTHER"-SIDE OF THE VAN..

(SHE HAD "NO"-IDEA..
I WAS "LYING".....IN WAIT--
LIKE AN ASSASSIN)..

WELL...
I TIMED-IT
"PERFECTLY"..

"JUST" AS CRYSTAL....

CAME WALKING-"OUT"
FROM THE "OTHER"-SIDE OF THE VAN.....

I "LEAPT" IN-THE-AIR..

(LIKE A BEAUTIFUL GAZELLE)..

& "LANDED"

"RIGHT" NEXT TO HER..

SAYING "BOO"..

AT THE "SAME"-TIME..

& SHE ACTUALLY-"SCREAMED"..

"HOWEVER"...

I "DIDN'T"-"STICK"

MY LANDING..

I SLIPPED..

& AS I DID..

MY ANKLE "TWISTED"..

& MY FEET "FLEW-OUT" IN "FRONT" OF ME..

& THE NEXT THING "I"-KNOW..

I'M "ON" MY BACK..

IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR PARKING LOT..

& "GUESS" WHO'S "LAUGHING"-NOW?..

CRYSTAL..

& THE "REST" OF THE SALES-STAFF

WHO WERE MEETING IN THE CONFERENCE ROOM..

WHICH HAS A "BIG"-WINDOW..

LOOKING-"OUT"
ON THE PARKING LOT..
 (0) Comments
Tags :  
Locations: Huntington
People: CRYSTAL DIAZ




 
Jealous of a DEAD actress
SO..

MY WIFE & I WERE WATCHING AN OLD-MOVIE OVER THE WEEKEND..

"I"...

LIKE OLD-MOVIES..

IN-"FACT"...1-OF MY FAVORITE TV CHANNELS IS "TURNER CLASSIC MOVIES"..

MY WIFE??...

SHE "DOESN'T"-LIKE MOVIES "OLDER"-THAN ABOUT-"1990"..

WELL "I"

TALK-HER-"INTO" WATCHING THIS FILM FROM THE "60'S"---
"BOB & CAROL & TED & ALICE"..

(IT'S "ALL"-ABOUT "FEELINGS"..
& "ENLIGHTENMENT"---
A BUNCH OF "HIPPIE-STUFF")..

THE STARS ARE ELLIOT GOULD..
ROBERT CULP..

A "VERY"-BEAUTIFUL DYAN CANNON..

& A "VERY-VERY"-BEAUTIFUL..
NATALIE WOOD..

NOW NATALIE WOOD

IS PROBABLY MY "ALL-TIME" FAVORITE ACTRESS..

BEAUTIFUL..
SEXY..

BEEN IN SOME "GREAT"-MOVIES..

THERE'S JUST-"SOMETHING" ABOUT "HER"..

SO..

WE'RE WATCHING "BOB & CAROL & TED & ALICE"..

& BECAUSE OF ALL THE "HIPPIE"-STUFF..

IT'S KIND OF FUNNY..

& "I"

"CAN'T" STOP

"COMMENTING"

HOW "CUTE"..
HOW "PRETTY"..
HOW "SEXY"..

NATALIE WOOD "IS"..

(BECAUSE SHE "IS")..

& THERE'S THIS SCENE..

WHERE SHE'S LOUNGING ON THE FLOOR..

IN A PAIR OF "BABY-DOLL PAJAMAS"---
"REMEMBER"-THOSE?..

& YOU COULD "SEE"..

HER CUTE-LITTLE-BOTTOM..

WELL OF "COURSE"..

I "HAD" TO "COMMENT" ON "THAT"..

(I "DID" HOWEVER..
RESIST-THE-URGE..
TO "BACK"-UP THE DVR..
& "WATCH"-IT "AGAIN"--------
& "AGAIN"
& AGAIN)..

WELL "THAT'S" ALL MY WIFE COULD "TAKE"..

SHE GETS-UP..

& "SAYS"..

SINCE YOU-"LOOOOOOVE" NATALIE WOOD "SOOOOO"-MUCH..

"I'LL"
LEAVE THE 2-OF-"YOU"..
"ALONE"..

& SHE GOES IN-TO THE LIVING ROOM TO WATCH "GLEE"..OR "SMASH"..OR
"GREY'S ANATOMY"..

& I "SAID"..

YOU "KNOW"..

THAT NATALIE WOOD HAS BEEN "DEAD"
FOR OVER-"30"-YEARS--RIGHT??..

& "SHE"-SAID..

"I------DON'T------CARE"..

I'M "SICK" OF HEARING ABOUT NATALIE WOOD..

(MY WIFE IS "JEALOUS"
OF A "DEAD"-WOMAN??)..
 
(GUESS I BETTER "NOT" ASK-HER TO WATCH ANY SALMA HAYEK
 (0) Comments